November 2010

This month I moved in with Beth and Wally. Actually Eryn, me and Kameron did. I am blessed to have such good family. I am saving to pay off my debtors, settle with them. I listed my home as a short sale and had a cash buyer with all the information in to the bank, Nationstar Mortgage. They foreclosed anyway. I got a few weeks to move out and they have the home up for sale. I don't think they will get what the buyer offered. If they come to me for the balance, I will get the information from the relator's and get an attorney. Now I will focus on rebuilding my life. No car, no home, gave away and got rid of and stored my "stuff". It is all stuff and when we die, someone has to take care of it or dispose of it. My cousin's son died, 25 in an airplane crash. Very sad, I attended the memorial in Provo tonight.

I went to church again today, all the meetings. It is difficult to go. People are sweet and kind, but I don't feel like I fit in. Our church is for families. I am part of a family, but I am a divorced woman, 4 times. I really don't want people to have that experience, but they say the most interesting things and sometimes, I want to stand up in church and say, "Can you tell me really where it says that in the scriptures?" But I sit and be silent, and know that they just don't understand. And there are promises made, and my experience is that they are not all true. Yet my life is not over, maybe they are but I don't get it. Something keeps me going, my belief that Jesus Christ is my Savior.

Goodnight.

Brenda

Annual Revision of Affirmations

May 16, 2010

I daily read or rehearse my Contract and I am revamping my Creation Statement. (The old one doesn't work all the way for me anymore because I have grown)

I clear my chakras morning and night through quiet meditation and movement (in the form of Yoga and or exercise.)

I pray morning and night and through the day for discernment and communication with myself and God regarding my tasks of the day.

I am present in my tasks.

I am honest in my actions and words.

I am sensitive to the spirits of others.

I speak truth lovingly and know some truths are for me only.

I know the difference.

I know when to speak up and when to be still.

I use what God has given me to use and allow excess to be for others, in time, talent, substance.

I am able to pay my bills.

I live comfortably.

I am in loving connected, open and honest relationships with many people.

I keep confidences.

I allow others their agency and choice free of judgment.

I focus on my life and listen to others when they want to share.

I speak only about matters that uplift or cause forward movement.

I am accountable.

I have a job that provides me with income to live on this earth and have freedom to do my life purpose.

I have time to pursue and create new interests.

Currently these interests are: Family History, becoming Hospice Certified, writing a book, essential oils and their effects on healing, pranic (energy) healing and uses, Thai Yoga Massage, preparedness, camping, Healthy eating, herb uses and gardening, connecting with others and learning from them about these interests and associated ones.

I consciously teach my children

Especially Eryn about truths and joyful ways to live.

I spend time with Eryn on school work and spiritual education.

I read to Eryn and listen to her read.

I give Eryn opportunities to develop her talents

I notice what gives her joy and direct her along the way.

My home in South Jordan sells and the banks agree with the terms of a short sale and release the house and me.

I find a simple place to live.

I am living with less than I make.

My car sells and I have a car that is mechanically sound and serves me in my current situation.

I tap into ways to connect with those who desire what I have.

I am guided and directed each day.

Eryn's direction and upbringing is a priority.

I eat healthy food and am worthy of its provision.

I have claim on the earth and heaven for provision of my sustenance and family's sustenance.

My relationship with Mark and Michelle moves forward in a loving way that is beneficial to us all.

I continue relationships with those of like minds and hearts who assist me and me them in any way.

I clear my space of old energy that doesn't serve me.

I have an open clean space to work in.

My home is open and clean and full of light.

I radiate light and peace.

I feel love from others and give love daily.

Daily I gratefully notice blessings.

My mind is clear and I clear my surroundings.

Desert Sage Healing Arts continues in some type of venue to serve others and share information.

I teach others to love themselves

I love myself

I heal by loving.

I am a Certified Hospice Nurse.

Brenda's beginning blog

About a year ago, I was in a lot of transition. I really didn't know where I was going or what I wanted to do, I had some ideas floating around inside of me, but no real direction. My life had taken a big turn and I had an opportunity to make many more choices than I was used to making.

With the assistance of my dear sister Beth, I sat down one day and wrote, using tools I had gained from trainings through church, (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints), and life coaching, (Kim Smart), and group experiential trainings, (Great Life) and (The Experience Training). I also tapped into my core self and let myself speak to me. Here is what came out then, and today I am updating it because some of my desires have changed. That is the beauty of life, it changes as we grow and learn lessons that are always there for us to learn. I am never complete.

February 2009

I daily read or rehearse my Contract and Creation Statement.

I clear my chakras morning and night through quiet meditation and movement (in the form of Yoga and or exercise.)

I pray morning and night and through the day for discernment and communication with myself and God regarding my tasks of the day.

I am present in my tasks.

I am honest in my actions and words.

I am sensitive to spirits of others and their needs.

I speak truth lovingly and know some truths are for me only.

I know the difference.

I know when to speak up and when to be still.

I use what God has given me to use and allow excess to be for others, in time, talent, substance.

I am able to pay my bills.

I live comfortably.

I am in a loving connected, open and honest relationship.

I keep confidences.

I allow others their agency and choice free of judgment.

I ask permission to get into others lives.

I speak only about matters that uplift or cause forward movement.

I am accountable

I have a job that provides me with income to live on this earth and have freedom to do my life purpose.

I have time to pursue and create new interests.

Currently these interests are building a network and community for those on their path to improving their life.

I consciously teach my children

Especially Eryn about truths and joyful ways to live.

I spend time with Eryn on school work and spiritual education.

I read to Eryn and listen to her read.

I give Eryn opportunities to develop her talents

I notice what gives her joy and direct her along the way.

I have a deadline for taking a job.

A job will come my way this week that meets the above requirements.

I stay in my home in South Jordan for now with financial ease.

Clients come to me for healing.

I tap into ways to connect with those who desire what I have.

I am guided and directed each day.

Eryn's direction and upbringing is a priority.

I eat healthy food and am worthy of its provision.

I have claim on the earth and heaven for provision of my sustenance and family's sustenance.

My relationship with Mark moves forward in a loving connected way.

I tie up loose ends and complete my tasks with Love Healthcare.

I have joyful loving memories of time there.

I continue relationships with those of like minds and hearts who assist me and me them in any way.

I clear my space of old energy that doesn't serve me.

I have an open clean space to work in.

My home is open and clean and full of light.

I radiate light and peace.

I feel love from others and give love daily.

Daily I notice with gratitude blessings.

My mind is clear and I clear my surroundings.

Desert Sage Healing Arts flourishes and reaches many who are searching and provides connections

I teach others to love themselves

I love myself

I heal by teaching others to love themselves.